Panda Plan
熊猫计划
China, 2024, colour, 2.35:1, 98 mins.
Director: Zhang Luan 张栾.
Rating: 3/10.
A lazy, throwaway attempt at a comic action movie, with an aged-looking Cheng Long [Jackie Chan] and a cuddly CGI panda.
The Noah Islands, somewhere in the Mediterranean, the present day. Exhausted after wrapping his latest picture, international action star Cheng Long [Jackie Chan] (Cheng Long) asks his manager David (Wei Xiang) what is next in store for him. After turning down most of the options, Cheng Long opts for adopting a famous young panda, known as Da Bao, in a ceremony at Noah Park, a large wildlife centre. He is welcomed there with much ceremony by the park’s director, Peter (Andy Friend). That evening, while quietly enjoying an ice cream on his own, he meets panda keeper Su Xiaozhu (Shi Ce) who invites him to meet Da Bao. Meanwhile, a ship full of mercenaries is on its way to snatch Da Bao; its commander, Cha Kun (Han Yanbo), has been paid US$100 million by a Middle East sheikh who is desperate to get the animal. Next day, while the adoption ceremony for Da Bao is taking place, the mercenaries, led by James (Temur Mamisashvili), immobilise the parks’ communications system and enter the Panda House. David hides when he sees them coming in. James recognises Cheng Long and tries to get him to fight; but Cheng Long says he’s just an actor. Meanwhile, Su Xiaozhu tries to hide Da Bao. David is eventually captured and held with the other people at the ceremony; later he leads an escape. The mercenaries chase Cheng Long, Da Bao, Davd and Su Xiaozhu across the island. Peter restores the communications system and manages to trap the mercenaries inside the park as Cheng Long & Co. escape through an exit gate. The group hides out overnight in a lighthouse, during which time Cheng Long renames the panda Huhu and Su Xiaozhu shares a secret with him. Next day they’re all recaptured and taken on to Cha Kun’s ship, where Cheng Long discovers he has some surprise fans.
REVIEW
Hong Kong superstar Cheng Long 成龙 [Jackie Chan] takes second billing to a cuddly CGI animal in Panda Plan 熊猫计划, a lazy, throwaway attempt at a comic action movie that has virtually no plot but still took three people to write. Playing himself in a one-line story about some bad guys trying to grab a famous panda he’s just celebrity-adopted, Cheng spends most of the time trying to send himself up as a world-famous action star who can’t actually fight. However, the joke never gets off the ground, thanks to unimaginative and repetitive action, routine direction by Beijing-born Zhang Luan 张栾 (Song of Youth 老师!好, 2019; Give Me Five 哥,你好, 2022), and a co-star, Mainland dancer-turned-actress Shi Ce 史策, 31, who is cute(-ish) but spends most of the time just screaming. Reportedly budgeted at RMB180 million, the film took a so-so RMB307 million as a National Day release last autumn, reportedly scoring high with young children, its only conceivable audience.
Aged 69 at the time of shooting, Cheng, with jet-black hair that sits oddly on his weathered head, has a tired look that sits well with his on-screen character of an ageing action star but doesn’t encourage much audience involvement. Though the script does contain some moments of apparent personal reflection – most notably when Cheng tells the heroine that, despite his age, he still gets a superhero buzz when he hears a director call “Action!” – the whole film is basically a big plug for panda conservation, and Cheng’s own celebrity role in it. That seems to have been the starting point for the whole project, with the plot almost an afterthought.
The film recycles many of the regular tropes in Cheng movies: goofy action, foreign villains including a statuesque blonde, knockabout humour, and stuff aimed directly at the kiddie market (here, a talking delivery machine called Tony). This being a Mainland production, Cheng is partnered with comedian Wei Xiang 魏翔 (overacting shamelessly as his craven, stupid agent), and well-known farceur Jia Bing 贾冰 pops up as the grumpy owner of an ice-cream stall. Technical credits are okay, without being anything special; as well as the title panda being CGI (well done), some CGI rhinos also briefly appear.
The film was entirely shot around Dengchigou, Baoxing county, west-central Sichuan province, a well-known area for panda conservation, during Aug-Nov 2023.
CREDITS
Presented by Emei Film Group (CN), Tianjin Maoyan Weiying Cultural Media (CN), Long Dong Dong Films (Haikou) (CN), Ya’an Culture & Tourism Group (CN), Haining Aijia Pictures (CN).
Script: Meng Yida, Xu Wei, Zhang Luan. Photography: Dong Daxin. Editing: Lin Zhuangyu. Music: Huang Yixin. Art direction: Wang Xi. Costumes: Yue Shijie. Styling: Zheng Zanzan, Song Chenhao. Sound: Yang Zhaoyue, Wang Shengwei. Action: Lv Shijia. Visual effects: Wang Shaoshuai, Yang Yuejuan.
Cast: Huhu (himself), Cheng Long [Jackie Chan] (himself), Wei Xiang (Da Wei/David), Shi Ce (Su Xiaozhu), Han Yanbo (Cha Kun, mercenary commander), Jia Bing (ice-cream stall boss), Andy Friend (Peter, park director), Temur Mamisashvili (James, head mercenary), Aleksandra Smirnova (Vivian, mercenary), Danny Ray (Harry, mercenary), Mwakifulefuleenock Mbokigwe (Roy, mercenary), Elain Ahmed Lotfi Rageh Algahefi (Pasha), Ivan Ponomarenko (Fariha), Omer Yazuak (housekeeper), Sean Kohnke (mercenary).
Release: China, 1 Oct 2024.